What is Love?

Dear Readers, 

Today, I want to talk about love. It is a subject that might bring many images to mind; hearts, cards, roses, and romance. With Valentines Day approaching I thought this would be a perfect topic to write about. Love is a topic that almost anyone knows about; it can be seen in the books you read, and the shows you watch (the world shows a different kind of love in their TV shows or romance novels). 

I have recently been going through a woman's devotional book called, A Woman's Walk with God: Growing in the Fruit of the Spirit. The chapter that I finished recently was about love, not the love that you may be thinking about with the hearts, cards, roses, and romance, but the love that God has to offer. There are so many verses in the New Testament that show that the topic of love is important to God:

-Living in love (Ephesians 5:2)

-Loving the people around you (John 15:12)

-Loving our neighbors (Matthew 22:39)

-Loving our enemies (Luke 6:27)

-God is love (1 John 4:8)

-God demonstrates that love through Jesus (Romans 5:8)

I could list many more verses about God's love and the commands He has for us to live with love (maybe you would like to do a little research yourself), but for now, I will elaborate a little more. Do you know that Jesus commands us to love as He loves us (John 15:12)? What does this mean exactly? Well, there are five principles that I have learned about, and I would like to share them with you.

1. "Love is an act of the will"

I don't know about you, but I have a difficult time loving under hard circumstances. It is especially hard when I am having a long day with school when I am tired when I am hurting, or wanting to be alone. 

That is when I need to find the "will" to love. Christian love calls for us to make conscious and deliberate efforts and decisions. It is only through Jesus' love that we can make the efforts and decisions to help and serve others when we are too tired or hurt. Love isn't all about emotions, it does require work 24/7, and this kind of unwavering love only comes from God (John 3:16; Matthew 20:28; Luke 9:51). 

The acts of love displayed by Jesus when he gave, served and died for the world's sin on the cross-were all acts of the will, not acts of the emotions. It is only through God that we can have the will to love in the way He calls us to love. A question that my book asked was this, "Will you look to Him to fill you with the kind of love that gave, served, and died to self, the kind of love modeled by our Savior?" 

2. "Love is action not just words"

You have heard the common phrase, "actions speak louder than words" and in this case, acting in love is no different. If you say to someone that you love him or her, whether it be your boyfriend/girlfriend or family members, but don't show that you mean it through your actions, then your words are pointless.

For example, one of the chores that my sister and I have is taking turns washing the dishes and putting the dried ones away. My family doesn't have a dishwasher which makes washing dishes twice as long, and let's be honest, no one likes to do the dishes whether they have a dishwasher or not. There have been countless times where I have grumbled about it because I would have rather sat around and relaxed after a long day at school and walking dogs for an hour earlier that day. My bad attitude, whether it be a chore or something else my parents assign me, is not an act of love. 

Through learning about God's love, I have begun to learn that life doesn't revolve around me. Who would have thought! Remember that your mom, dad, or whoever is entrusted in the taking care of you, has had a long day of work as well. My mom works all day in the house to allow me and my sister to do school, she makes lunch, washes and folds laundry so I have clothes to wear, and being homeschooled, my mom also grades both my sister's and my schoolwork. My dad works all day to provide for the food I get to eat and fixes things around the house even on weekends at times.

Love means that even when you just want to sit and read a good book or go for the relaxing walk, you wash the dishes without complaint or help with any other chore you are able, it also means having a good attitude. In my mind now, the chores I do aren't just things I have to get done so I can have free time, they are my way of showing that I love my parents by making life a little easier. Imagine what would happen if our parents did their work plus our chores? They would never be able to rest! Love is work and requires action. When our actions can show we mean what we say, that is proof of love (1 John 3:18). And remember that you can't love like this without the help of God's love. He is the one that gives you the strength to love when you don't feel like it.  

Look for ways to love, there are ways to all around you every day, at your church, doing extra chores around the house, and in your neighborhood are a few ideas to be looking for ways to put action to your words. Another quote from the book says "And God's Spirit, at work in you, will cause the glorious fruit of love to blossom in your life as you walk with Him and do His work of love." 

3. "Love reaches out to the unlovely"

No one likes to be kind or show compassion to people around you who are downright grumpy and unappreciative. It is much easier to love someone when you get something in return; even the simple, "Thank you." makes you feel appreciated for being nice. However, loving those around you that are the hardest to love is what Jesus calls us to do. The Sermon on the Mount clearly states this when Jesus said, "You have heard the law that says, 'Love your neighbor' and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike" (Matthew 5:43-45). 

This was a reminder to the people that Jesus spoke to that anyone, even the unbelievers could love the lovely: "If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind to only your friends how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that" (Matthew 5:46-47). Can you now see that God calls us to love both the people who are the most unloveable and the people who are the easiest to love? No one deserves God's love, He simply is love and gives it freely. This is what we are to give to everyone around us, no matter their past or how they treat you. It is through God's spirit that it is made possible for us to love our enemies as Jesus commands (Luke 6:35).

Think about it: Who comes to mind in your life that is irritable, that is ungrateful and rude? Someone who you would rather yell at then is nice too? Has a name flashed through your mind? If so, then there you are! That is the "enemy" that Jesus calls us to love. An author, Jerry Bridges puts it like this, "To recognize that there is someone I do not love is to say to God, 'I do not love You enough to love that person.'" God gives us the grace necessary to love that person and to extend it to everyone around us. His spirit allows us to love as He loves-without condition. 

4. "We need God to help us Love"

Jesus knew when he was preaching the Sermon on the Mount that it was perfectly normal for people to love those who love them back; it goes above the laws of nature however to love those who don't love back. If we were left to ourselves we wouldn't love our enemies. Jesus calls us, however, to love our enemies through God, by allowing Him to love the unloveable through us. We obviously cannot do it on our own, we would end up hating everyone who irritated us! 

The devotional book gives this quote by William Barclay, a commentator, "[Love], means that no matter what a man may do to us by way of insult or injury or humiliation we will never seek anything else but his highest good...never...seek anything but the best even for those who seek the worst for us." This seems to show that we defiantly need God to help us! And the best part is that when we walk in God's love, we become a tool, a testimony, to God's hand in our life! Surely it can be seen that God is at work when we can love a nasty person that is downright mean to us; only He has the power to allow us to love that person! Not only that, but we will also have to become more dependent on God for His love so that we can love again and again, and to follow His command for us to love.

We need to look for the face of Christ in the faces of the unloveable. If we do we will begin to love for Christ's sake and not our own. If you can see Jesus in the eyes of the person who has caused hurt-by the power of the Holy Spirit-be able to use God's love upon that person (Romans 5:5). The love God has is there for us to extend to everyone around us, and as followers of Christ, we need to remind ourselves that those hardest to love, need it the most. 

5. "Love expects nothing in return" 

When you loan money to a friend, you expect to get your money back sometime shortly. The same idea goes for someone we are nice too, we expect them to show the same consideration to be given back to us. Jesus says that we need to show love to anyone, regardless of them showing the same compassion in return. He says this, "Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Highest, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked" (Luke 6:35). We need to love without any thought of getting something in return. 

God offers love to the unkind, this is the same love offered through Jesus (Romans 5:8,10). We need to love because God is with us and wants to give His love to the rest of the world. Jesus says that we need to love as if we were loving Jesus himself (John 13:34)! This is especially true in our own homes. It is very important to love your family members, no matter how annoying your siblings can be. God will offer His love through His spirit so that you can show that same love God gave to your family. They may be the people who most need it in your life right now! We are not to be self-seeking. The world says the opposite, but love expects no reward. And don't forget to pray for people who are the hardest to love, they need God just as much as you do. 

Defining and Living Out Love

With the five principles, you can see that love is a sacrifice of oneself. Dr. John McArthur explains this: "Love is not emotion. It is an act of self-sacrifice. It is not necessarily feeling loving toward a particular person. It may not have any emotion connected with it (Romans 5:8). God always defines biblical love in terms of self-sacrifice." This is basically saying that love requires effort, work, action, and not just feelings. You may not feel love toward your siblings, but putting in the extra work to help them with their homework or whatever they may want your help with, shows you care and displays God's love. Remember, love isn't all about feelings. 

Self-sacrificial love requires that we go before the Lord and ask that He reveal the places where we are selfish and what we need to do to live in His love. He will show us where we need to change and that we need to obey when God says we are to love Him and everyone else-whether you feel like it or not! Don't worry, you are not alone, He will show us where we can let our actions speak louder than words. 

Loving can be annoying at times, and we can tend to get impatient. To show love to the people God places in our lives is a challenge that we face every day. We won't always feel like loving, but when we allow God to fill us with His endless supply of love, we can bring it to everyone around us. The love isn't even ours, it is God's. God can fill us up to the brim with his unending love. He is the source. When we go back to Him, He will give love to us to share with others. Working to love and using our will to love, allows God to use His love to pour on others through us. 

When we feel like we can't possibly deal with another person in our life, we must go back to God and ask for Him to fill us up again. The hardest time to love is the times to go to the Lord for His love. There will be times when you feel like you can love for eternity and others where you want to just give up, but that only means that you need to turn to God for strength. He is after all the only One who can help you to love. God constantly wants to fill you with His love, and He will never stop (James 1:5). He is love, and patient with His children. 

What You Can Do

Here is an assignment for you to work on (remember, love his work). Pick a person in your life that comes to mind that is hard to love and put the principles you have learned into action! Be sure to pray to God and confess any thoughts you may have had toward this person that isn't nice, any of your attitudes contrary to God's ways, and times you have failed to let "your actions speak louder than your words." Ask God to help you follow His Son's command in Luke 6:27-28. 

1. Love the people God puts in front of you, especially at home! 

2. Go to God throughout the day to get a fresh supply of His unfailing love! When things start to get tough, go to the Lord.

3. Remember you are to serve. 
Note: If you want to learn how to experience this kind of love, check out the blog's other article, Simply the Gospel! If you have any questions comment below or email us at teamskypegroup@gmail.com!

Galatians 5:22-23: "But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!" 

Sincerely, 
Sabine G. Anderson

George, Elizabeth. A Woman's Walk with God. Harvest House Publishers, 2000.